Wrong if you do & Wrong if you dont

 Do any of you have this one thing...or maybe two things in life that you feel you were wronged by and that you can not seem to let go? Man I sure do. It just never seems to go away. It was thrust into my life without any say so. It is recognized by many ...even my own husband that it was wrong( so I know im not being too sensitive) and yet...those involved dont get it! Im so tired of feeling that sick feeling in my stomach. Yeah sure, almost everyone would tell me to get over it. That too much time has passed for it to still hurt me. Believe me, I wish I could. I wish I could get this icky feeling out of my gut. I think the thing that keeps it from going away is my own self pride of not just letting a sick behavior continue with no consequence. That is SO wrong to me. I have to just keep on taking it and if I say anything there will be hell to pay and I will be made out to be the sensitive one...and so what if I am sensitive. I like to make sure that I dont hurt people with my actions. Maybe I expect the same from those around me. Maybe I shouldnt.

 So how do I get rid of this stupid feeling? I know that it has to do with forgiveness. You know how its the hardest thing to do? well yeah...The thing is, I have tried to forgive and forgive and forgive and let it go, but the same thing keeps happening. So doesnt that mean that I never really forgave in the first place? I just need to find some kind of resolution and peace about it. I know that peace has to come from the Lord. I know now that is the only way it will go away because I cant do it out of shear will power.